


Collision

by groggyluck (abyssobrotulaCronos)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Emptiness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-05
Updated: 2013-10-05
Packaged: 2017-12-28 13:07:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/992333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abyssobrotulaCronos/pseuds/groggyluck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Among infinite universes, you're sure of the most important one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Collision

There's an universe where sunlight is bullshit. Where he cries in despair, clings to you and say, several times, that he wants to die. This universe is full of dead friends and smog, flying dogs and explosion. You don't like it, and you think, as you hold him against you, that happiness is a distant star apart from you by many, many years. There's another one where you watch from a far place, you can see his house from there. Then he is, indeed, happy, cheerful and dense as hell. This universe is made of a soft veil and fireflies, they fall upon you and all your thoughts, caress your skin and leave behind the soft feeling of pain and knitted hearts. Somewhere, you know there's still hope. But for real? You're not even interested anymore.

Endless planes run through your head, you can't help it at all. The flat ones, the ones which have a start and an end, the ones which float and drown, the ones in which there is only loneliness and something made of strawberry ice cream. A faint smell, you guess. Maybe mountains and a small creature never to be known.

Beside some planet, his body drifts away from yours and disintegrates next to another sun. Buried in water, vanished among fire, swallowed by wind.

All those ends may not have an explanation, but they are real and they scare the living hell out of you.  
They won't destroy you, no, but they make you insecure and heavy, falling apart on the inside, feeling the need to protect him, even though he needs zero protection because he knows how to take care of himself; thank you very much.

Once you heard about the universe in which he was never born and you were transformed into a robot. Then about the one in which he died. The one where everyone else survived and carried on with their lives, so young and tragic. Don't you wish you were magic?

You can't think of an universe without his power and grace, without his strength. Without his loud way. But, somehow, you can think of one where he lives without your nuisance and permanent sense of danger, longing and neurotic manners. You're not neurotic, you're caring and loving. He fails to see that.  
You don't care. Sometimes you have fights, sometimes it's his fault, some other times it's yours. Some other times, it's fate who deserves to be blamed because none of you really know the reason, but it is there and it's unbearable.

Six feet deep, sings the moon of the yellow night on the last existence you've ever been. You don't like to think about the others, they seem unreal. When you're on the brink of sleep, they make perfect sense. Why don't you believe them when you're awake? Somehow you manage to block that thought. You hate not knowing something.  
Jake knows that.

You two don't fight the whole time. It's rare, but can't be avoided.

When you think about those possibilities, you're far from him.

When you're together, like right now, sleeping on his chest, you forget them sucessfully.  
It's just the present. The present doesn't scare you, because you can control it.  
The first universe of them all is this one, in which you are right now. Laid upon him, listening to his heartbeats, hands and legs tangled. You like knowing his existence is happening.

This is, by far, your favourite universe.

**Author's Note:**

> [x](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bKAAKX9pM4)


End file.
